Affirmations in My Locker

I keep a piece of paper with a hand-drawn picture of myself with affirmations from camp surrounding it in my locker at school. That being said, I feel really weird about it. Every time someone seems to be looking at my locker for an abnormal amount of time, I tilt myself and my locker door to try and hide it. I try to send the message of, "Nope, no...I totally don't keep nice things people said about me in my locker. I most definitely do not need that encouragement...". 

Here's what I imagine people think when they look at the inside of my locker:
1. "That's so weird."
2. "Why do you even do that? It's not like you need other people to validate you or something."
3. "Isn't that bragging?"

Here's why I keep it anyway:
1. I'm sorry, but school is hard. Don't get me wrong, my school is amazing. Still, WORK comes with prestige and a wonderful liberal arts curriculum.. With work, there comes with the potential for failure. With imperfection, that potential changes to a you-will-feel-like-a-failure-sometimes guarantee. Reading nice things about myself helps sometimes.

2. The people who wrote the affirmations know me completely outside of the context of the stress/failure mentioned in #1. Yes, GPAs and standardized tests were mentioned more than once. However, rather than a "I have a _._, you have a _._. Can we still be friends?" or "How much have you been studying for the [insert name of standardized test here]?" type discussion, the conversation tended to veer towards "Stop freaking out, Lydia. Studying only helps so much, and you can always retake it next year.". Still, we mostly acted as members of a community in which we all felt loved. I don't know how my camp friends are doing in school, and they don't really know how I'm doing in school either. Sometimes it's hard to remember that I am a person, with a personality that has nothing to do with being a "diligent student who tries really hard and goes to tutoring, but still fails sometimes". Reading affirmations from camp reminds me that I am, and that that girl, based upon what people say about her, is actually pretty cool.

3. We can't let this break us.* Mental health is important. If reading affirmations reminds myself that I am worthy, even when my grades aren't perfect and I'm spending more time stressing than sleeping, then that's what I'm going to do. 

In conclusion, sleep when possible, read affirmations when necessary, and never miss out on the opportunity to affirm/be present with other people. It's a tall order, but I hope to meet it someday. 

Stay amazing!
<3 Lydia

*VERY IMPORTANT: Mental stability isn't anyone's 'fault'. By "we can't let this break us", I mean that we, as a species, should try to do everything within our power do what we can to keep ourselves from exploding under the pressures of life.